This Seat’s Taken interview series: Ruby & Peter of A Journey We Love

One of the best parts about travel is the fact that, often, it leads you to right where you need to be. In fact, without getting out of their respective hometowns, Peter and Ruby of A Journey We Love would never even have met.

“Peter and I met in Jacksonville, Florida (USA) even though we’re from different parts of the world. Peter was born and raised in Bratislava, Slovakia, while I was born and raised in Manila, Philippines. We coincidentally met at work in the USA where he sat on a desk on the opposite side of me!” Ruby writes.

Their shared love of seeing the world has taken them on countless adventures, a trend which doesn’t seem to be slowing down anytime soon. So, this week, Ruby and Peter have kindly shared their experiences of traveling together, and their amazing advice for not only being a better traveler, but for being better travel partners.

How did you get started traveling together?

Travel became a big part of our lives early on. On our first date, we went to Barnes and Noble and I told him that I lived in England for a bit and have backpacked around Southeast Asia because the travel bug hit me when I was 23 and never left. He, on the other hand, thought that it was cool but never bothered to travel alone and was always hesitant to go somewhere without a travel partner.

We chose to travel together as a couple because it was fun and was a good test of our relationship. After our first big weekend together in Charleston, South Carolina, we decided to go to Rio de Janeiro to watch the World Cup. We booked airline tickets and the world cup tickets a month after we started dating, so that’s a bit risky! And we have been traveling ever since.

Do you have the same travel style or different travel styles? How does this impact your adventures together?

We do have the same travel style but I would say I (Ruby) am a bit more extreme than him. I crave daredevil adventures sometimes so while we were in Rio, I was thinking of paragliding but in the end, didn’t get a chance to for lack of time!

I also sky dived and got a SCUBA certification – things that Peter would never do. He is however, up for the opportunity to snorkel and interact with animals in the wild. We snorkelled with manatees in Crystal River, hung out with Sting Rays in Sting Ray City, saw bears and moose in the wild in Alaska, and so on.

So he’s willing to do a few things with me – after a little coaxing of course.

Ruby and Peter enjoying the cherry blossoms in New York City

What’s the biggest thing you’ve learned from traveling as partners? What makes your partnership work on the road?

We’re experiencing the same things at the exact same time and it makes more wonderful memories for both of us. We learn and grow together as partners, and so we have more things to talk about. We try to marry our interests together with our love of travel, too. For him, it’s his love of football (soccer for Americans), so we went to the World Cup in Brazil in 2014 and the Euros in 2016 in France, and we included a lot of side trips in the middle.

He also understands my love of animals and nature, so we tend to hike a lot, and go on a kayak and just explore. We also made a quest to visit a lot of National Parks here in the US (if not all).

Our partnership works on the road in a sense that he’s a designated driver and I’m the navigator. We work a lot better that way when I am directing him to where we need to go while he calmly drives our car along the road.

It also works where he is the more calm and patient one between the both of us. If things go wrong, he usually is the face and the voice of the both of us as he tries to explain a certain situation to certain individuals. Meanwhile, I’m in the background telling him what to do and what rights we may have.

Same thing with our blog, he is normally the ‘face’ while I am the voice. It works perfectly that way since he is the more outgoing between the both of us (and thus, complete strangers tend to open up to him faster), while I am the more timid one.

Ruby and Peter at Bok Tower and Gardens

What’s the best part about traveling as partners? And the biggest challenge?

The best part about traveling with partners is the shared experience, as I mentioned above. Experiences are better than physical things, and we have moved on from giving ourselves physical presents to experiences for special occasions. That is, unless we really need a certain physical item. Traveling with a partner who is game and in tune to your needs and wants is also great. He looks after me and decides that we should rest and stop even if I want to go on but I’m clearly tired or not feeling well, and he makes most of the decisions when it comes to food and restaurants (because I am useless in that front and would eat fast food all the time if it comes to it).

The biggest challenge is you are constantly together. If I want to go shopping, I can’t just blow him off and tell him to go do his own thing unless we have decided we’ll spend a few hours apart from each other. You have to be considerate with each other’s interests. You may end up spending an hour or so tasting beer or bourbon even if it’s not your thing, but it is all compromise!

Based on your experience, what’s the best advice you have for couples who have just scheduled their first trip together?

Feel each other out and be considerate of each other’s needs. Don’t set too high an expectation that this trip has to be perfect. Sometimes it is the imperfections that make the trip more memorable and fun. Also know that a trip is supposed to be fun! Do not put too much pressure on yourself or your partner.

Discuss all the activities that you will do, but do not make a rigid itinerary that there is no room to change around in. When you get to a destination, you may want to do other things that were not part of your original itinerary and that’s perfectly OK!

And of course, compromise, compromise, compromise. Talk to each other too and hear each other out!

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