So much of what we see from travel couples online comes from twentysomethings living their best #vanlife or with the enviable situation of being digital nomads. But traveling with your significant other can take on infinitely more forms than that, and can come at any stage of life. Chris and Steve, the adventurous “empty-nesters” behind Explore Now or Never exemplify this perfectly.
And happily, they’ve volunteered some of their best experiences and advice, and are sharing just how they make it work as a couple traveling throughout the States and, now, across the world.
What’s your story?
Steve and I have been married for 31 years now, but when we first met, we bonded over our shared travel experiences. He was a PhD student in molecular biology who’d just returned from bicycling the Italian Riviera solo and I was an undergrad who’d just returned from a year studying abroad in Poitiers, France.
For many years after that—during all the time we raised two kids—we mostly traveled stateside on road trips around the U.S., traveling cheaply through home exchange from our base in San Diego. These days, we’re empty nesters (woo hoo!) and ramping up international travel big time.
So far in 2018, we’ve visited friends in Austria, lived like locals on a work trip to a medieval town in Germany, snorkeled with sharks on Moorea in French Polynesia, and hiked a glacier in New Zealand! We’re headed to The Tetons in Wyoming and then southern Spain next. Traveling together is one of our favorite ways to connect and feel joyful.
Do you have the same travel style or different travel styles? How does this impact your adventures together?
We both love local experiences, foodie destinations, and opportunities to be active when we travel. But we excel at different aspects of travel so we each try to play to our strengths. For instance, I’m a huge planner so I book flights, tours, lodging, and fun things to do. But Steve is a master at on-the-ground logistics. Since I have a ridiculously bad sense of direction, he’s in charge of navigating train stations and car rentals!
What’s the biggest thing you’ve learned from traveling as partners? What makes your partnership work on the road?
Patience with each other! We both try to be flexible to make sure each other’s individual needs are getting met. And if they’re not, communication about that is super critical!
What’s the best part about traveling as partners? And the biggest challenge?
The best part is having a shared experience of so many travel adventures. We don’t spend much on material things these days…everything goes to travel. As a result, we have so many rich memories together. We can finish each other’s sentences: “Remember that pear ravioli we had in….?” “That epic storm when we…?” It’s pretty funny actually. I love reliving our adventures together!
The biggest challenge for us I think is when things don’t go according to plan. We’ve had our share of travel fails…like the time we found ourselves driving past the Duomo in Florence when the nav in the car failed (waiting for the expensive ticket from the ZTL zone)…or missed flights…or language barriers on a day when we’re exhausted and starving and jet lagged. These things are bound to happen!
Based on your experience, what’s the best advice you have for couples who have just scheduled their first trip together?
It’s pretty much the same advice I’d give to any couple who want to have a long and satisfying marriage: Be respectful, find joy in the small things, give each other some space when things are challenging and someone is on their last nerve. Try to give your partner the benefit of the doubt when you’re completely frustrated.
Travel can be very intense and exhausting. It’s filled with magic moments and also low lows sometimes. At times you may feel like you don’t have the energy to figure out or decide one more thing. That’s when it’s most important to take a few deep breaths and find a glass of wine or settle on french fries for dinner!
Any additional words of wisdom?
I think travel is a great way to infuse a relationship with a sense of adventure and fun. Sometimes that can go missing in the workaday life. So get your mojo back by visiting a place you’re both dying to experience. I’d also say that if you adore your partner but your travel styles just don’t mesh, then give each other the gift of traveling solo or with others. In the end, you’ll both come back together refreshed and rejuvenated in the unique way that meeting new people, tasting new foods, and experiencing new cultures can provide.
Save this wisdom!
The 10 best travel backpacks under $70 on Amazon that have a serious following
